Endings

I think I start every post by saying something along the lines of - "it's been a while," but this time it actually has. About five months, in fact. A few people reached out recently asking about when I would be writing a new post and inquiring as to why I haven't written in a while. To be honest, the site changed the way pictures are uploaded and something told me that if a post didn't have pictures it wasn't worth it. Dumb. I know. That coupled with laziness and the overwhelming feeling of being behind got me stuck. BUT! I decided to get back on the horse and write something that's been on my mind lately. And that is...

...endings...

Endings are hard. Endings are inevitable. Paradoxically, endings are what make things beautiful.

One of my closest friends, Lara, and I were discussing this recently. As our year abroad comes to an end, its something we've been dwelling on a lot lately. The feelings that come with an ending come in waves and about a month ago we were going through a wave of sadness which isn't a very uncommon feeling that typically comes with endings but then we got to talking...

If we were to stay in Italy indefinitely then there would be no urgency to appreciate these last moments. We wouldn't be forced (as much) to look back over the year and remissness like we do. If we were here for many more years and everything stayed exactly the same we would just be.

Endings are beautiful because they allow you to reflect.

Some endings are exciting. Some endings are terrifying. Some endings are sad. And some endings are happy. Some endings are an accumulation of them all. I'm just hoping and praying that I can enjoy the little bit that's left of this year and appreciate the end by allowing myself to be sad but not dwelling on it. Instead, I am choosing to look at this ending in joy.

(And for those of you wondering just exactly when my "ending" is - it will most likely be some time in the beginning of December.)